Second Acts (for non-politicians)

Whoever it was that said that there are no second acts in politics was generally correct (think Spiro Agnew, Ed Meese, etc.). What about the rest of us, particularly after losing a spouse through death or divorce? Obviously, divorce is easier because at least you can turn some of the anger into energy and find another person that suits you better. Death is harder, especially when the survivor is older and female and loved her deceased husband. There are fewer widowed older men out there than there are women and, at least for their generation, those men were trained to expect women to cook, clean and generally take care of most domestic responsibilities that didn't involve power tools.

But what about women between 55 and 75? Men their age - if they want a second act - seem to have no full-length mirror in their house but are looking for 30ish women who are a size 4 and started botox injections when they were in kindergarten. If they have a few bucks in the bank, they might actually get Malibu Barbie to spend some time with them.

Women tend to be more realistic and want companionship with someone who remembers where they were when JFK was killed, can stay up past 8:00 p.m., speak in complete sentences and don't take their dentures out in a restaurant, but don't care very much about whether the guy can still get into a 40 Regular suit or can read and interpret poetry. Unless living in a large city, even women who have managed to make it to late middle age/early old age as a size 10 and who continue to keep themselves looking younger than their true age are told to go to grief counseling or church-sponsored events to meet potential companions or even future husbands. Those who white-knuckle it and attend those events are probably greeted by a dozen other women of various sizes and shapes and two men, one hooked to an oxygen tank and the other wondering when Malibu Barbie will show up. Instead of getting a follow-up call from a guy, they'll get a call from a woman in the group who wants them to do whatever one does to become a "born again" Christian, notwithstanding their current religion. It doesn't sound like much fun to me.

This is patently unfair. There must be another dignified way for well-educated, good looking older women to have a second act even if they live in a smaller community and aren't interested in moving, don't want to change their religious affiliation and don't want to spend all of their time feeding a grown man once they find one. Internet matchmaking sites don't qualify. Anyone who has any constructive ideas on this topic is welcome to comment. In the meantime, I hope that all women in that boat don't give up. Not everyone is going to have a Diane Keaton/Jack Nicholson moment but you never know until you try.